Think and Grow Rich- What it means to me

I picked up a copy of Think and Grow Rich at my local library. It is one of the better books I have recently read. It made me think long and hard about the issues that have been plagueing me for quite some time. The book talks about how people create self fulfilling prophocies because of their negative attitudes... that we fail to define what it is we want in life and waste our time hoping wishes become reality. The idea spoke very loudly to me because I am that person. I am constantly expecting failure and hoping for a miracle. Many times I have posted and named various things that I planned to do to change my lot in life. None of which ever included changing my mindset. So I might start doing yoga and or taking herbs, and in my mind I am thinking this crap probably isn't going to work, but cross my fingers I hope it does. When it doesn't work I think to myself, of course it didn't work. God, hates me and that's why he refuses to allow me any crumbs or success or happiness- why would I expect the 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 time to be any different?

Napoleon Hill believes man finds his success when he finds something he feels so passionate about he will stake all that he has for it. So the question is, do I desire change so badly I will give all that I have in the pursuit of happiness or die trying? I decided the answer is yes. So now when I am having those self defeating conversations with myself, I stop and refocus on other things. I put my energy towards moving foward. I remind myself repeatedly of my goals throughout the day and I tell myself if I persist there is no way I can fail.

I still have the same problems. My husband is a dick. I'm broke. I'm half nuts. But when I dwell upon those things, 5 minutes later he's still a dick, 5 more minutes later I'm still broke, now 5 more minutes later I'm still half nuts and 15 minutes later I have lost 15 minutes of my life. Now I have a savings account I am putting money into, now I have a job I am trying very hard to make work, now I am creating a blueprint for my future. To many people it probably does not seem like much. To me its progress that I know will build and build. Hope all is well with everyone. Thank you or your comments. I really do appreciate you guys putting up with me;)