BPD children

I have been thinking about BPD a lot. I have a stat counter on my blog and to some degree it gives me information as to how people find me - what they are looking for. It seems that there are a lot of people who are trying to understand what bipolar is or maybe what to look for if they have children that have been diagnosed. I have the same concern for my own children. They at times display behavior that is of grave concern to me. I wonder if I am overreacting but more than anything I want to shelter them and assist them because I don’t want them to go through what I have gone through.

This post will probably come off as tangent. I am unorganized and I have 50 things to say. Sometimes it’s unclear how to bring things together…Oh well here we go.


When I was a child I was horrible when awoken. I can not explain but I was incredibly angry if someone disturbed my sleep. So much so I kicked my poor pregnant mother is the stomach once because she woke up and on another occasion I chased my older sister out of the house with a butcher’s knife because she woke me up. On either occasion I was not driven to hurt my mother or my sister but I wanted to make it perfectly clear I was not to be woken up. I know it sounds crazy that I would go to such lengths. It is just as crazy to me. I don’t get angry like that anymore but when I was probably between 7-13 years old I was incredibly irrational and I suppose fair to say “out of my mind” when someone woke me up. I also did a lot of sleep walking and talking which provided ample amusement for everyone.

My own children are violent when woken. I, of all people, should be understanding but in all honesty I have a tough time with it. My daughter bites, kicks screams, pulls my hair and tells me she hates me. Sometimes it takes 30 minutes or more to calm her down. I become so aggravated I began searching the internet for clues as to what might cause such a reaction but I found little information. One site did say that this type of behavior (with regards to being woken up) is common in children with bipolar. This of course had me concerned. What does a bipolar child act like? Should I know? What is normal childhood development and what is not? I really have no answer for this. Like everything else in this world, the devil is in the details. I know how I felt when I was a child but what does that mean to anyone else? Children need to be able to communicate their feelings so we understand their actions. If they say they do something because they are depressed, anxious, nervous etc., I think it is something that needs to be explored further.

If you are a parent looking for information I think it is important that you go to different mental health sites but it is equally important that you read about other people’s experiences. To read the standard list of symptoms and to read what it is like to live with, is two entirely different things. Come with an open mind and realize that some things you will not understand. That’s ok, just be supportive. Being supportive is by far the most important role you play. It is when a person feels abandoned, alienated or as if they have no safe place to turn that they will cross lines they would otherwise not.

Your child may share things with you that are hard for you to hear. Listen anyways. My mother and I often had conversation in which she would state, “I wish you would not tell me that.” I would always respond to her by saying “that’s fine, I can lie to you now and we can save your embarrassment for later.” If your child is engaging in behavior you would rather not know about, trust me when I tell you the truth ALWAYS reveals itself. Do not encourage lies because it somehow saves your own dignity. BPD is beyond your control. Is has nothing to do with your parenting skills. It is a heavy weight, so help them carry the load. There are lots of BPD communities on the net. Feel free to explore, don't be embarrassed to ask questions. People suffering with BPD are bright, caring and want to help. All you have to do is ask...